


I Need You

by AnnaDestiny



Category: Free!
Genre: I Don't Even Know, I am so freaking sorry, Implied Character Death, M/M, Please Forgive me, Song fic, What have I do?, dedicated to my friend, slightly angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-26
Updated: 2015-02-26
Packaged: 2018-03-15 08:29:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3440414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnaDestiny/pseuds/AnnaDestiny
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Haru needed very few things in life.<br/>Water.<br/>Mackerel.<br/>and Rin.<br/>And one of them was missing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Need You

**Author's Note:**

> Dedicated to a friend of mine, Brooke, who killed herself because of bullying. She was like a sister to me and one of her favorite songs was titled 'I Need You'. It was a beautiful song and it reminds me of her, so here I am, writing.
> 
> Disclaimer: Sorry, don't own Free!

_I Need You_

_Like water_

_Like breath_

_Like rain_

_I Need You_

_Like mercy from Heaven's gates_

_There's a freedom in your arms_

_And it carries me through_

_I Need You_

* * *

Haru's breathing had faltered. His face had lit up in shock and horror, shaking the unmoving corpse over & over again, begging Rin to wake up. He'd run his fingers through tangled and wild red hair, praying that he'd be able to see those ruby red eyes again.

But he never did.

Though his friends would argue differently, water wasn't the most important thing to Haru. He loved it dearly. But no where near as much as he loved Rin. The same Rin who'd died without a reason, the same Rin who'd been so full of life and the last one Haruka would ever expect to pull suicide. But every time someone decides to end their life, in the aftermath, the question that lingers in everybody's mind is:

 _Why_ _?_

Why would they leave this Earth, when so many love them there? Why would they end their lives before they'd even begun? The answers to these two questions are different for everyone. But this did not quell the sadness overflowing from both Haru's eyes and heart. It wasn't fair, that someone who'd done nothing wrong, felt as if they weren't worth it. Why should they?

Had Rin felt worthless? Empty? Hurt?

Signs of regret passed Haru's facial expression. Was he the cause of the dreaded death of Rin Matsuoka? Him and his damn attitude, always focusing on water and swimming instead of his boyfriend, or even his friends. Had it been his fault? Perhaps it was, but what was done was done.

But, just as we all do, Haru wished he could go back and time and change the future.

There was nothing he wouldn't give to see Rin, mouth open and shark teeth glistening in the sunlight. It was far, far better than an empty corpse with shut eyes and tight blue lips. Just any sign of life from Rin would've sent Haru's heart into fireworks, exploding in a bright flash of light. But that was impossible. The dead can't come back to life.

To be honest, Rin had been some what of an inspiration to him. Though encouraging was not quite the syncing word, Rin had been very motivating and pushing, helping Haru with the struggles of life or swimming itself. He remembered the day he first met Rin as a child. Big, wide blue eyes had caught shining ruby reds, and soon the two became friends.

But where was that friend when Haru needed him the most?

The rest of the swim team had given him condolences, especially Makoto, for Rin's passing. He appreciated it, he really did. But saying 'I'm so sorry' didn't move a dead body, Haru had thought emptily. They'd even purchased bouquets of flowers, and had pooled money to get a beautiful coffin, but it didn't make Haru feel any better. What mattered to him most was who was inside the coffin, not what the coffin was.

Maybe he should've told Rin he loved him. Given him a reason to stay on this Earth by his side. But it was too late.

Haru had no actual regrets other than the simple fact that Rin was gone. So many more times the two could've shared, both personal and public. So many more times Haru could've heard Rin's laugh echo and bounce of the walls. So many more times they could've sat under a Sakura tree, watching the blossoms fall like some sort of young couple in love.

And that's what they had been.

Rin might be gone, but Haru stilled needed him. He'd never stop needing him. He could never, ever let go.

He needed Rin like he needed the ability to breath.

He needed Rin like he needed food & drink.

He needed Rin like he needed love and kindness from others.

He _needed_ Rin. Not wanted, _needed_.

 

The number two is impossible to achieve without first having two ones. But what happens when you take one of the ones away?

 

The other number is left alone. By itself. Without consolation, without any kind of encouragement. Without a friend or a partner.

 

"I need you, Rin." Haru whispered as he draped his head over Rin's cold one, kissing the pale forehead gently.

And for the first time in their lives, Rei, Nagisa, Makoto...Saw Haru shed a tear.

And another.

Another.

Another.

Another.

Till he was sobbing, hiccups coming from his throat in rough, short bursts. The one who'd always acted so sassy and so calm, so needless, was sobbing. Normally Haru would've thought that he was pathetic for crying so heavily.

But human beings are human beings, and sadness is the hardest emotion to control.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I know this was sad, and I'm sorry, but I just had to write something. Anyway, I hope you semi-enjoyed this! And as for the artist who sings the song, 'I Need You', I don't really remember but will add it right here when I do.


End file.
